Love On Yourself

Dominique wearing a "Black Girls Are Magic" Hoodie while sitting on a dark blue sofa. In front of a window with white curtains. Pink drapes on the edges.

Do you show yourself love? Or are you caught up in the “when” trap?

When I get a new job. When I make more money. When I lose weight. When I get married. When this thing happens, I will feel good about myself.

Let me tell you something. You don’t need to wait until your “when” happens to feel good about yourself. You deserve your own love. And you deserve it right now!

I live alone so I have a lot of conversations with myself. I use this time to swan dive into my thoughts and feelings without the input of others.

I love to sit and ask myself questions a loved one might ask while comforting me or helping me work through a problem. Questions like, “how does this make you feel? Why does it make you feel this way? What can you do about it?”

But since I live alone, I tend to miss out on the eye contact and body language that comes from those much needed pep talks.

The kind where their words, eyes, and entire body say, “I care about you and I love you. And I want you to love and care about you too! I will legit fight you if you don’t start seeing how amazing you are!”


I already use mirrors as a part of my body acceptance practice. So I started using some of that time to also check in with myself. I look deep into my eyes, give myself my undivided attention, and just talk.

Sometimes it’s to remind myself that I got this…whatever this is. Other times, it’s just to remind myself to breathe, unclench my jaws, and that everything is okay.

Mirrors are not just a tool for vanity. They’re an amazing gateway into getting in touch with yourself! And they’re perfect for when you need to practice being nicer to yourself.

Talking to yourself in front of a mirror can help you get used to speaking positively to yourself and counteracting any negative voices in your head.

It can help you get used to looking at yourself and being seen as you are right now. It can help you get used to the sound of your own voice. And most importantly, it can help you practice loving on yourself!

Also, it doesn’t have to take long. Everytime you go to the bathroom, make a point to make eye contact with yourself while washing your hands.

It doesn’t matter what you say or even if you say it out loud (though it’s good to try) so long as it’s full of positivity, compassion, and love.

If you need help remembering to love on yourself, try using PANK! It’s vibrant, it’s passionate, and it’s a powerful reminder that you deserve your own love.

Get the PANK (bright pink) color card and give yourself the love you deserve with a Self Love Check-In!

How do you love on yourself? Let me know in the comments.

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